walking and writing more
Lately things have been nicer and different here. I really enjoy just the going each day. I think if all this had some purpose or lofty intent, I would not enjoy it so much. Instead it seems to just be the day and the now to me. Like I do not have to measure or control or gauge things. Most of the things I do really are better without those things. Often the days are divided into a few things.
the walking
For the last four years or so, Iāve felt the walking really become this continuous thing. If I do not do it, I get this sense of confusion and frustration inside. Like something I must have, this addiction, is missing. Along with the walking I like to find things to hold on to so some photography along the way helps.
The walking becomes this end to itself. I pick a direction and a coffee shop I wish to strive for but more often I go some other way or completely change the things. From where we live, the dirt roads branch out in rural Siem Reap. I can reach different neighborhoods and I really enjoy when my purposeless wandering gets me to Wat Bo district. Today I almost ended up walking through Wat Bo but took a turn a different way. Kind of this way and that with small side streets and alleys connecting different bigger roads. I still find alleys I have not walked and so the joy in just going persists and grows.
Another walk I enjoy is heading north out of the main east and west road known as National Road 6. This road if taken will get you to Phnom Penh after some hours. For me, itās like this artery and vein of connections to these wonderful side streets where the quiet grows and homes are secluded and people fewer.
Once I cross one road though I am in this busier market street and cars and motos and tuktuks whir by. I like both scenes. Both offer differences for me to wander by.
Today though the walking was to Muni Coffee primarily because I like the coffee shop but also the road I like to walk after goes to the next road and then I have to decide which way to go. I donāt think I really decide. I just do.
The road has these beautiful secluded homes I dream of living in. Behind careful gates with only a minimal view inside. Iāve felt life should not be out in the open like it is where we live. People deserve some sense of self. At least I do. I think most Cambodians really enjoy the social scene but also want the time when the door closes and the fence latches and they have their time.
The street just continues on past beautiful flowers and little hotels and guest houses. Each one this time of year is busier so I see expats and tourists out walking and on bikes a lot.
Finally, the road drops me off at this other road and I just turn. I go past another favorite coffee destination and then back to the Main Street our house is on. Past little shops that fix motos and others that sell cars and furniture. I think thatās the notable thing where we live. If you want a moto fixed or some of the wooden furniture here, this is the place.
the writing
Somewhere starting in the mornings, I take my morning stretch at just finding words for the diary. Time to collect and select and just do. The writing really has no end for me and one dayās markdown file bleeds to the next. I have no real interest in keeping the old ones because Iāve felt they are āold meā and this me is different by days or moments.
Writing in the blog often starts out a different way. I just start writing. I have no idea where a thing is going most of the time. If it wants to wait another day, it does. Bearblog is patient with me. When I moved the blog from 11ty, my main writing thing was to have an easier time of just doing the writing. Less stops and starts to the process. I also wanted the community I could see on bearblog. I wanted to feel like my writing was part of some larger community. Whether that larger community read the blog or not did not matter. I wanted to just find that and then participate.
The daily writing is an easy pastime for me. I have no sense of drafts or outlines or scheduling the writing. It all just comes whether I want or not. I feel like the writing before and the writing now is just some tenuous thread. Sometimes broken because I donāt include the old writing but I also feel much like the journal there comes a time when I see the old writing and I can say,
oh... that was old me. I have more and different to say now.
The writing never really seems like more to me. It just feels like another avenue to turn much like walking but down different little places called paragraphs with stops here and there.
bringing it all together in this kingdom
The kingdom of wonder they call it. Perhaps I should call it the kingdom of wandering. Today I managed to walk and write and then eat this wonderful meal my wife made. Itās almost Lunar New Year so I start thinking about Vietnamese friends. Some I can still reach out to and others have disappeared behind some veil. One I found an email address for. This person years ago I took for Mexican food in Hanoi. I have fond memories of seeing the two girls with knives and forks confronted with crispy tacos. They got the hang of it all soon and asked for seconds. Vietnamese people do love to eat. The last time I was in Hanoi my friend David took me out a few times. Once to a Mexican place up in Tay Ho district where his girl friend worked. We sat there with tacos of all different kinds and cold beers.
Sadly I have not been back to Hanoi since then so the walking and writing becomes moments of memories. Hopefully later this year we will go. I cannot be away from Vietnam. At times it almost feels like a physical pain. I could do without Thailand forever. Thereās nothing there I want. Vietnam is different.
So thereās my walking and writing and some scenes around Siem Reap. Wonderful steps and words.